"Starting is fun, but the future belongs to the
finishers."
TLDR: the biggest enemy in finishing goals is perfectionism.
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According to studies, 92% of New Year's Resolutions fail.
People always put more emphasis on the starting, on how much planning you
should have, the effort required etc. Jon Acuff disagrees.
Starting is easy. You can always start dieting, start
quitting cigarettes, start learning a new language every once in a while.
To finish what you have started is the hard part.
Like its name suggests, "Finish" is a book talking
about finishing goals. I think this book is quite harsh to losers like us. As
you flip through the pages, you will see yourself amid the examples, who have
repeatedly failed themselves in completing goals and promises.
The author provides the reasons why people do not finish
their goals, as well as some tips on how to overcome them. Although the writing
is weaker near the end, I think it is still a good read nonetheless.
According to Acuff, our worst adversary is perfectionism.
You will see this throughout the book.
As we start our goals, the first thing it whispers to us is
"quit if it is not perfect". This often plays into our mind because
we always expect straight A's in our goals. Once we have broken the streak in
healthy eating, we feel that eating junk for the next day doesn't create much
harm too.
We all know that things are never perfect, yet we still set
up unachievable standards for ourselves. That's why the day after perfect is
what separates finisher from starters; finishers embrace imperfections because
they know that something imperfect will not kill them.
*
Have you ever set a goal or a to-do-list too big you
realized that you couldn't complete them? Scientists call this "planning
fallacy", where people underestimate the time and effort required for a
task.
The author suggests that, after planning your goals, either
cut the target into half or double the time you take to complete it. Of course
perfectionism does not allow that. But studies have shown that people who take
"shortcuts" have increased performance and are motivated by their
"reduced" success.
*
Time is limited. So, to get things done we have to manage
our time properly. We can listen to audio books while doing workout, studying
finance while waiting for bus, preparing slides while having lunch. If we slice
our time nicely, we can get them all done.
Wrong.
That's another lie from perfectionism: you can have it all.
The only way you can be good at things is to invest your
time and effort. To give them to some goal you must take them away from others;
to be good at something you must suck at others. You can't get all off them
done. Hence you have to choose which you want to succeed at, otherwise you will
fail them all.
*
I always despise using rewards or punishments to propel
yourself towards a goal; you shouldn't use external factors to motivate
yourself because the rewards should come from the goal itself.
Jon Acuff said that it is perfectionism talking.
Perfectionism believes success must be full of hardship and fun holds no value.
Internal motivation is good. But to keep yourself awake till
the finishing line you need external motivation. The author suggests two:
1. Reward motivation
2. Fear motivation.
As you choose either of them, perfectionism tells you that
you need neither: winners don't need motivation. They just get things done. That's
the moment you know that you are on the right path. Perfectionism only gets
loud when people start moving.
I thought I can stop here but I realised I haven't talked
about the most important things yet: hiding places and noble obstacles.
Hiding places first. They come in two forms. The first is
the unproductive ones, like watching YouTube and drinking with friends.
The "productive" ones are hard to detect. Have you
ever found yourself checking emails, cleaning your room or proofreading assignments
that you have competed long ago before starting your work?
"I wanted to do abs but look at the floor! I can't sit
there before I have cleaned it first right?"
Meanwhile noble obstacles come with two words:
"until" or "if-then".
Until I buy myself a pair of decent sports shoes I won't
start working out. Until I have a good plot for my story I won't write the
book. If I start eating healthy I will be poor real soon. If I establish my own
business I will become so busy that I lose my time with my loved ones.
Hiding places and noble obstacles are, still, perfectionism
in disguise; it tells you that you should do everything perfectly, otherwise
might as well not doing them at all. Perfectionism always makes things hard and
complicated; finishers make things simpler.
Goals are simple but not easy. It's time to leave your
hiding places and abandon the noble obstacles. Because goals you refuse to
chase don't disappear.
They become ghosts that haunt you for the rest of your life.
